Catrice's Curious Case

Dear Lemony Snicket, let me borrow your “curious case.”

“How are you doing it?”

The woman, I bet, was the mother of the client cuddling her spaniel on the exam table. She was one among the few who out of somewhere pops the question again and again. I payed forward doing the physical exam and history but her nosy nature seethed until I was done focusing the slide on the stage. 

“Did you marry someone from here?

 “I am a single mother” I answered straightforwardly without missing that quivering inside. Que horror! I am not a widow. My answer cannot simply be bought by close-minded people. For when I start with my first word, you would start assassinating me with all the fault I myself created. So I need to converse with you with a tub of coffee. I am a single mother, by choice. Singly doing two jobs as vet and mother. I just do them. It is not as easy as saying it. Morning breaks. I wake up to my baby to change her diaper into an economic nappy. I feed her at predictive times in between suckling. I let her play around. Night falls. I send the tired baby to zzz’s after I cleansed her up. On lucky days, I have my sweet neighbors and their voluntary nanny-ing. Her crib has done its purpose even with toys on it. Whilst, I do my veterinary work. I vaccinate four-legged creatures, treat them or confine them in our little abode.

I was late in my twenties when I was all new to independence -- pursuing a career and saving for the drought days. Part of being a woman was the monthly period I didn’t expect to miss. This marked the new chapter of my life. The fear was there. The shame of carrying a bastard in an illegal relationship rushed up to my head. For a moment, the panic that sprung up smothered. It was the magic of words I clung on to. I kept the child because I knew it was the sanest thing to do.

That was the craziest thing I did for love.

But a woman is a woman. She has an instinct. I saw things were not coming the way they should. I heed to think about things for their occurrence. So I even sold my soul, I say, thinking I can keep the man, but truly, you can never lose what you never had. The characters we were given were due to be slayed. Romeo (in my heart) must die. Juliet stays alive for her daughter.

Now left to me is a suckling, adorable toddler -- the reason for me to remember Children’s Month every November. Children are mother’s best gift; I got one. I wish she stays this sweet and innocent but time is made to go forward. I know the days coming through won’t stop her being inquisitive why our family has only a mom. Right now, let’s embrace our twosome-ness our fate has us.

“Uh, love, no one’s ever gonna hurt you, love. I’m gonna give you all of my love. Nobody matters like you. So Rock-a-bye-bye, baby, rock-a-bye. I’m gonna rock you.”

My daughter is doing me mega doses of daily laughter. Why so funny, darling? I wanna live up to forever!!! It makes me forget how her mouth turn to full “o” when she cough up her phlegm and feverish nights due to shots, teething and colds. It covers our days when we miss everyone out there when mama has to work like a dog to earn us meals. You readily dance crazily fun . You hum sing-sang.

Thank you, daughter, for driving away my insanity, for seventeen months.

My rockstar!

Mommy's rocking star!!!